Actor life lesson - utilizing your team

I started life with a fierce independent streak. I'm not sure where it came from, and I'm sure my mother would have had a much easier time had I not wanted to do everything myself or on my terms. I wanted to come out feet first, nature be damned. (Sorry Mom. Bless your heart.)

That streak hasn't really lessened in the 20-odd years I've been roaming the planet. Often my independence serves me well - it came in quite handy when the tour truck I was driving by myself broke down in the middle of nowhere, Nevada. (Is that redundant?)

Sometimes my independence gets in my way, like when I forget that I have a team.

All actors have teams. When you start out, that team might just consist of you and your family, if you are lucky enough to have their support. Slowly your team grows to count the people who like you and believe in you and want to see you succeed. Then your team starts acquiring players who can do more than just cheer you on - managers! agents! publicists! stylists! accountants! lawyers!

I'm lucky enough to have a few people playing with me on my team. However, I'm so used to doing everything myself, I forget to utilize them. Or I forget that we're on the same team and am afraid to ask them for anything because I don't want to bother them or I'm afraid of what they'll say. Or I just don't think about it, and that can be a costly mistake.

Use your team. Practice your passes. Have your manager look over anything you sign before you sign it. Don't be afraid to ask questions or ask for help. You're all sharing the same bench and playing towards the same play-off! The same championship! Going for the same Super Bowl!

The metaphor is dead, but I'd like to take it a little further. You're going to fare better with a line of teammates behind you, because sometimes you're going to be playing against The Man. People With Power. Corporations Who Don't Care About Your Image Rights. That's what happened to me, and now I'm looking to draft a new teammate - Mr. Union.

I'm done. (And I promise to avoid sports metaphors in the future - that was exhausting.) I appreciate the work and the exposure. But I won't be making the same mistake again. I hope you can learn from mine and avoid it altogether.

The Unveiling

That is quite a presumptive title.

I've been absent of late from the blogosphere. Partially because I've been busy with my survival job, which is not so great, and partially because I've been busy with my real life and acting, which is great, but also because I've been struggling with how transparent I wanted to be and whether I wanted to come out as myself.

I'm coming out. I'm me, and I'm linking myself to myself. I had this idea that I wanted to be honest about things so surely I shouldn't attribute that to Lauren Dobbins Webb (gasp! I'm out!) the actor in LA. But I was wrong.

I've learned so much since my first post here two years ago. One of those things is that honesty is best, and I'm going to get cast for being me, not for being someone lame with no personality who hides their real feelings behind a blogosphere pseudonym.

I also thought about going back through my old posts and taking away some of the fainter-of-heart ones, but in the spirit of the new honest and open Lauren Dobbins Webb the actor in LA who talks about it, I didn't. So don't judge. The learning curve is steep. Lesson #347.

So, now that that's off my chest, here is what I've been up to:

* Shot a commercial for Vehix, currently airing on Comcast:

* I'm understudying Lavinia and Chiron in Titus Andronicus at Theatre of NOTE in Hollywood, opening this weekend.

* I just got cast in a short that will be shooting in Prescott, AZ. More on that when I know more.

* This is from way back in the fall, but was super awesome: I got flown to Argentina to shoot the footage for Big Fish Games' Mystery Case Files: Dire Grove. Here's the sizzle reel:

Other than that, I'm auditioning, looking forward to what is next, and enjoying the palpable excitement of pilot season. Haven't been sent out for it yet, but excited about it nonetheless. The LA air is electric with excited and anxious actors.

I apologize for not being open and completely honest before, but that's over now. I'm an open book. Please don't call me. Unless you work in casting.

Brains of Minerva

I found a ridiculous amount of awesome information today, mostly from my new favorite actor website, Brains of Minerva. I wanted to make sure to share it.

This has been a rainy LA week of auditions for me. Hope everyone is doing well!

January 12 of 12

First 12 of 12 of 2010. I'm doing it, even though I'm at work and struggling not to bore you all with the inane minutiae of my day. Thanks as ever to Chad Darnell for the idea.


1 of 12 - Green tea. I'm a week in to switching from coffee. It's up and down.



2 of 12 - Blood orange snack.



3 of 12 - I'm afraid this isn't going very well cause I'm busy at work and forgot to whip out the camera on my exciting lunch break trip to the ATM, post office, and Trader Joe's. View of the ocean from the office. Also me, on the way back from a trip to the printer.


4 of 12 - View looking south. The clouds look neat.


5 of 12 - I can never make it through a whole day in these things.


6 of 12 - I know it's a bit redundant, but I thought the sunset was pretty.

12of12 FAIL. I'm sorry. I'll try better for February.

Leeky Scallops with Squash "Pasta"

I really like to cook, and I like to take photographs. Yesterday I was inspired to combine the two likes and post my cooking adventures, when I remember.

Last night we made Leeky Scallops with Squash "Pasta." The scallops were an adaptation of Rachel Ray's Leeky Linguine with Shrimp, which is delicious when made according to the recipe, but we had scallops on hand and are trying to slim down, so we substituted the pasta with Zucchini "Pasta." We eat zucchini like this at least once a week in our house. It's delicious and versatile. I like it alone with salt, pepper, and parmesan, or with pasta sauce.

Anyway. Here are the scallops in process:



And here is the finished product, the scallops and sauce stirred together with the squash and topped with parsley and parmesan:



The scallops were a touch overcooked for my taste, but overall it was pretty delicious.

December 12 of 12

Hooray for a weekend 12th of the month and me actually remembering to do it! It was a great rainy day here in sunny Los Angeles. Thanks as ever to Chad Darnell for the idea.


1 of 12 - Starting the day with caffeine and naughty Shakespeare.



2 of 12 - I love sitting on the porch when it is raining. Makes me think of North Carolina summers as a little girl. Our violets are very happy about the rain.



3 of 12 - Our bougainvillea is not very happy. Anybody have any suggestions?



4 of 12 - Luna has not had his coffee yet.



5 of 12 - Roomie and I braved the rain to visit the Bust Craftacular at the Echoplex.



6 of 12 - My craft fair purchase. I love puns.



7 of 12 - Rainy days are for baking.



8 of 12 - On the menu - vegan macaroni & cheese from the Skinny Bitch cookbook (SO PHENOMENALLY DELICIOUS!) and non-vegan chocolate chip cookies. We like to cover our bases.



9 of 12 - Carbfest commenced.



10 of 12 - Roomie and I get meta with our cameras.



11 of 12 - Seeing a show at the Raven Playhouse.



12 of 12 - Luna is Miss Cutie. Erm...Mister. Luna is a he.

Happy Holidays y'all!

A good day!

Today was a good day. I auditioned for "Criminal Minds," became SAG Eligible, and my dad told me he thought I have a good singing voice. :)

Paging Confidence

I was recently told that I have a unique perspective in my writing and that reading my blog is interesting. By someone who isn't my mother. So here it goes again. The floodgates are re-opened. At least to the small trickle of an idea that I have right now.

I'm pretty sure that a lack of self-confidence is a common plague of actors/twentysomethings/artists/people in general. I fall into all four of those categories and sometimes suffer more than my fair share of a lack of confidence. I know I'm the only one who can change that blah blah blah and more on that later.

Last night I auditioned for an improv team. I was very flattered to be invited to audition in the first place, as I don't always feel like I know what I'm doing when it comes to improv. I've been in the program for almost a year and am starting my seventh and final level next week.

When I have auditions for things that aren't improv, I'm excited. I feel comfortable. I usually feel like I have a handle on it and know what I'm doing. I don't always leave the audition feeling like I've rocked it, but I usually feel like it was appropriate for me to be there and that I haven't wasted anyone's time, my own included.

The difference in how I felt leaving last night's audition sort of astonished me. I did the standard self pep-talk on my way in, and the group did a great job of being welcoming and doing warm-ups together to make everyone more comfortable. And then I just felt sort of paralyzed. My mind went blank, which is never really a good thing, but in improv it's sort of antithetical to the point. I was paralyzed by my lack of ideas and by the judgey judgey devil-Lauren in my head that gets amplified when I'm nervous, scared, or generally feeling lost. I left feeling horrendous and embarassed that I was so bad and now all of these people know it.

Today I'm trying to figure out what the difference is between auditioning acting Lauren and auditioning improv Lauren. My comfort level may just reflect the sheer amount of time that I've spent (and not spent) doing each. But I can't wait that long to feel comfortable doing improv.

I always get to this point and feel like I'm just whining.

I want to believe in myself, and I usually do. I think I have an unfortunate reliance on empirical evidence with most things in life, but my "that was good" receptor may not be completely objective. I say may not, but of course it isn't. I've always been ridiculously hard on myself. That isn't objective.

How do you grow confidence? How do you stop watching and judging yourself? One of my acting coaches once said "Judgment blocks creativity." Of course it does, I'm living proof. But how do you stop doing that?

I always feel ridiculous asking those questions, especially since I work in a town and in an industry where if you don't believe in yourself, no one else will. So figuring this thing out is sort of important.

Going to post before I re-read, judge, and edit. What a ridiculous cycle.

12 of 12 for August!

Hiya! July 12 came and went completely unbeknownst to me...I've been in a bit of a fog. Here is my 12 of 12 for August! As always, thanks to Chad Darnell for the idea. Head on over to his page to check out the 12 of 12s from around the world!

1 of 12 - 8:14 am - There is a light at the end of the Wednesday tunnel...


2 of 12 - 10:40 am - Amusing myself at work, which solicited the response "Lauren, you're weird."


3 of 12 - 2:45 pm - Doing some recon. I need a periscope.


4 of 12 - 3:20 pm - Picking up my CSA box of veggies!


5 of 12 - 3:45 pm - The awesomeness that is the inside of my box of veggies. For $15 a week, you get one of these. They have pickup locations all over Los Angeles. Check out their website.


6 of 12 - 3:58 pm - Food porn of my lunch.

7 of 12 - 4:30 pm - Loving the library next to my building.


8 of 12 - 5:52 pm - Traffic artistry.


9 of 12 - 6:11 pm - View from Beverly Glen. There are worse commutes.

10 of 12 - 6:20 pm - My chauffeur.


11 of 12 - 8:45 pm - Finally hanging stuff on the walls.


12 of 12 - 10:45 pm - Hanging out on the roof trying to see the meteor shower. We saw two. Apparently I lack a steady hand.

Thanks for checking it out! See you in September, when hopefully my focusing abilities will be better.

Have you Googled yourself lately?

I know internet privacy is an ongoing issue and the mantra "be careful what you post" has been told to us all repeatedly, but I just discovered a new (to me, at least) and alarming site when I Googled myself.

Spock.com is one of a few sites that now troll the web and aggregate EVERYTHING about you on one convenient page. My full name? Check. Phone, email, birthdate? Check. Photos from the Friendster account I created almost 10 years ago, that I haven't even logged in to in almost as long? Check. Spock also offers the "feature" of people being able to tag you with whatever term they want, which, as you can imagine, is not always a good thing. Here is an article on Spock and the tags - http://bit.ly/11LKEe and here is another article in Wired - http://bit.ly/llHdf

I never used my full name on Myspace, and my facebook profile is only viewable if you are my friend. I have now gone through and deleted my Myspace and Friendster accounts. As actors, we are in a tricky situation, because our LA Casting, Actors Access, LinkedIn, and personal webpages are also showing up, so any contact information listed there is now added to the Spock page. I know this is available by any Google search, but somehow it's scarier to me to have it all in one place.

The Spock privacy policy states that since they pull their content from the web, the only way to avoid having it on their site is to remove it from the web. Since I'm not going to remove my resume and contact info from Actor's Access, I guess I just have to live with it. If you create an account with Spock, they email you whenever anyone edits your profile. I'll be doing that, since it seems like the only way to try to stay in control of any invalid or unsavory information.

The articles are from 2007, and I know that I have googled myself since then, so I'm not sure why I'm just seeing it now. I know there isn't much to be done, but I just wanted to give everybody a heads up. You might want to Google yourself more often. (Giggity. I've wanted to say that every time I've said "google yourself.")

So. Be warned. And yet another reason I'll always keep my blogger identity at least thinly veiled.